So I’ve been reading Galatians this week, and I’ve really been reminded of some powerful truths that I so often forget in my life, and I thought I’d share. As usual, this may not make sense to anyone but me, but if you have ever read my blog, you should be quite used to my craziness…lol

I am a people pleaser big time. I generally avoid confrontation and conflict, and will just shut down and silently suffer if it avoids an argument. Ask Matthew, it drives him crazy lol. Anyways, the relevance of that is that I am that way because of this fear that if everyone isn’t happy with me all the time, they won’t want to be around me. This led to many years of me putting on a happy face at school and church because if I wasn’t the “fun and bubbly Courtney” that I was so often described as, I wouldn’t be wanted.

This insecurity has always been a really big issue for me in my relationship with God as well. My mom can tell you, when I was younger, there would be countless nights that I would wake her up because I couldn’t sleep. I would lay in bed and think about all that I had done wrong that day and just doubt my salvation. After all the times I had failed that day, how could God still want me? It took me years to really realize that I didn’t have to doubt God’s love. On Sunday, Archie said something that most people probably didn’t even notice, but for me it was such a sweet reminder it brought me to tears. He said, “ Once your name is truly written in that book (talking about the Lamb’s book of life), no one can erase it, not even you.”

I’ve always been one of those people that seeks perfection in everything I do. In school, in church, in my relationships. One of my biggest fears growing up was disappointing my parents and my family. I was one of those children that would much rather have a spanking than have my Mom or Dad look at me with that disappointed look. That really carried over into my relationship with God as well. I would try to be the best Christian I could possibly be, constantly trying to please God. Now, don’t get me wrong, we should try to please God in our lives, but somewhere along the way, I went from trying to please God, to trying to earn Him, and that’s not living by faith, it is living by legalism. I’m telling you, I would have been an amazing Pharisee. This legalism has been a constant spiritual battle in my life.

However, reading Galatians this week has reminded me of the freedom we find at the foot of the cross. Like it says in Galatians 3:11, “Christ redeemed us from the curse of the law by becoming the curse for us!” Christ has already taken on the burden of our sins and our failures. He took on the wrath that we deserved so we wouldn’t have to live under a system of laws, so that we could have freedom in him. The Galatians were forgetting what they had heard and slipping back under the law. Paul tells them to stop acting foolish! “Does God give you his Spirit and work miracles among you because you observe the law, or because you believe what you heard?” (gal 3:5) I so often am foolish, just like the Galatians. I get carried away in what I have to do to please God instead of simply sitting at his feet and being swept away in his love.

There is nothing that we could ever do to deserve God, which is hard for me to grasp sometimes. If there is nothing I could ever do to deserve Him, then why does he want me? The only answer I have been able to come up with, is that God doesn’t want us so we can do things for him… He is all powerful, he can do whatever he wants with a single word. He doesn’t need us. He wants us to worship him. To be caught up in the amazing love he has shown us and live a life of freedom through his promises. Because when we are truly free in him, then we get so overwhelmed by his love and grace and mercy, that we unconsciously become a beacon of hope in this world.

So remember, “It is for freedom that Christ has set us free. Stand firm, then, and do not let yourselves be burdened again by a yoke of slavery.” Galatians 5:1

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